my continually new "self"

i have done some thinking, and maybe "the very notion that there are such things as selves—individuals who persist over time" is not so true. maybe i am who i am at one moment in time and what i believe is the cause of who i currently am (my past history) is only a perception rather than a reality.

this thought, though not beyond what reasonable people probably agree with without thinking of and not really that novel, perturbs me slightly. To help aid myself to have a more accurate perception of my past, i want to write in this blog more often. That way, I can come back and check up on things.

Anyways, things have been going pretty good. I have finally decided just to relax and enjoy summer, as opposed to trying to get a head start on my law studies. July 4th was a reunion of windsor peeps of sorts and it was really good times, props to dan and others for that.

Work has been going well, if a little tiring and laborious; and my sister came home last tuesday. Recently we have been playing large scale basketball games. It consists of two crews. My crew which usually is a rotating cast of characters: pat, alok, aakash, steve, nick, justin and jason berman, jerry and others. We face off against chris z, greg panos, the robesons, justin verrier, laruen dillon, sean elligers, and mike torf. as you can see, we have enough to have subs on both sides. the games have been pretty intense and very enjoyable.

My knees have recently started to hurt a lot, so i am going to try and dead all my cardiovascular activities besides these bball games which means an end to my running and biking. I have still been going to the gym with jerry on a semi regular basis and increasing my strength which has been cool. I have been eating pretty poorly as of recent though so as I cut back on cardiovascular exercise it's probably a good idea to curb my eating of carbs.

I have been doing a lot of reading this last couple weeks, just random online magazine reading. A lot of the reading has been about the intelligence level of animals, something i find very interesting. Even though one doesn't currently exist, the idea of a separate sentient species that humans could interact with, a whole different type of organism, fascinates me. An interesting (and possibly evolutionary impossible) hypothetical is what life would be like if the earth was mostly covered with water and did not really have land masses and sentient sea creatures evolved (like super advanced whales). What would their lives be like?

I also read some stuff about the genetics of religion and one idea that intrigued me was that a person who believes in the concept of "luck" or "karma" in the supernatural sense is a religious person, i had never thought of this before, and i find it a conceit that i can agree with.

Anyways, i think this may be enough for now.

Yesterday, which was a sunday, i went to the gym with jerry then later went over his place and watched a pool volleyball game, played some poker, then ate pizza and chilled, and after that went directly to ice cream place in the center of town to meet up with vicky. it was funny i was talking to chris p on the phone in the parking lot and all the sudden reed zacharias just biked up to me, apparently he was going for an evening ride, which is cool. Now that i think of it, i wonder who is taller, reed or kelton, i am going to guess reed. Anyways, after ice cream with vicky we went to the establishment across the street, the union street tavern, with pat mccooe. I proceeded to drink a lot, as i had not drank in awhile and wanted a good buzz (LOOOOL). i had 3 drinks, pat had 2, and vicky had 1. I had to rush the 3rd drink cuz the place was about to close and on the way back home i called chris p as i was driving and told him of my state and he made me end the call and call him when i got to my house, that good Samaritan he is haha.

that is all.

peaceee.

wait, some more things

things i really want to do:
visit DC

thing i am currently waiting to do:
watch the new harry potter in IMAX 3d.


PEACE

GOOD MORNING...WINDSOR!!!

hey, long time no see. since my last blog post I started working, got some law school books, went to a crazy graduation party, went to a sick concert in NYC, got a posse of indian family together in suits, some buzzed and some torched and we beat some old school windsor peeps in some BBALL annnnd also its a close call, depending on what factors you decide to weigh the heaviest, but i may be in the best shape of my life.

anyyyways, for what i have been doing recently.

brett was home for the latter half of this week so i was hanging out with him. Pat, Brett, and I went to see TF2 which was pretty good times. saw some great fireflies in action over the bridge to loomis chaffee school with them and steve the other night also. work has been pretty good times, boss is pretty cool, other interns are cool. most of the time im doing some odd research but whenever i get to go to hearings it can def be entertaining. the best by far has to be the liquor hearing about Shay's Great American Bar and Grill which sounds like it would be a great place to hang out pre Aug 08 when it got busted hahaha.

Also got to meet and ask questions to a state supreme court judge which was really cool. while we were walking around the offices inside the building there was a office marked "Judge Ment." I don't know if this means there is a Judge somewhere whose last name is Ment, but if so, that is hilarious.

I've been playing a lot of basketball, and exercising in general, but don't let that fool you into thinking ive gone all health nut. Yesterday I had 2 full meals and then some and then at night proceeded to finish off an entire pizza, It was super good times, i heart eating tasty food.

I got some law books that i should get to reading, i will start reading them like its my job in july, at least thats the plan. we'll see how it goes, u know me, i studied probably 1/64th what i planned to for the LSAT, maybe less.

Michael Jackson died this last thursday. It's pretty crazy. I saw a snippet of something from byron crawford on twitter and then as i was driving to Uconn West Hartford to meet Alok and his friends to play bball both 103.1 and 93.7 were playing MJ and they dont normally do that. SO i hurriedly called Chris P and he told me that MJ had only reportedly gone to the hospital for cardiac arrest and hadn't died. But then while playing basketball he called me back and someone got a text saying he was dead, which was pretty shocking. It's weird because I've never met the guy, I havent really been an active fan in years, but it still kinda made me feel a strange sadness when I heard he died. I went home and I finally opened the 2nd (i opened and probably lost the 1st) MJ #1's cd I got for my 16th birthday party and ripped it to my mp3 player and have been listening to it on and off since then.

Tomorrow is the BET awards and there is def going to be a tribute to MJ of course. Rumors swirl that Chris Brown might do a tribute to him, which would help him get back on to rebuilding his image, I hope that does happen, just cuz i want to see what that would look like and see the effect it has on its image, but i have a feeling it wont.

So tomorrow my 3 things to do are, 1. mow the lawn, 2. go to the gym with jerry, and 3. watch the BET awards at Aakash's house.

next week Dan is having a 4th of july BBQ at his house, which i am looking forward to cuz i havent seen him or Sarah in awhile.

And i hope osmetime this July for one weekend i go visit all my peeps in DC!!! that would be great, and im almost positive it will happen.


as far as today, i was supposed to go to Veena's wedding but i didn't. I wish her all the happiness in the world though. But, I can't really remember her face and i'm pretty sure we have never had a conversation over 30 seconds in my life. It is rough because i used to be friends with these guys, but I havent seen them in years and the wedding is not the right place to rekindle those kinds of bonds I feel like, it's way too personal. I enjoy relaxing and taking things easy when I can. I wouldn't want to get formal and be all polite and have to talk to people in that kind of situation unless it was people I was really close with. I was glad my parents kind of understood where I was coming from and didn't hassle me too much about not going.

Anyways, today i just hung around, watched some tv, went to the gym with Jerry and Marlene, hung around some more and eventually went on a relaxing bike ride at dusk through some old school spots I Hadn't been through in awhile. and I rode through all the new construction that has come through, including all the duplex houses and the new ING building.

Anyways, im going to go relax, maybe watch some boondocks, maybe lie in bed and dream, then fall asleep lol. THIS HAS BEEN A HUGE UPDATE. I hope it doesn't take me as long to do another post as it has in the past, i want to update this blog fairly regularly.

HAYLO soldier, ur not ready for war. N-N-N too strong for ya'll

what up, been graduated almost 5 days now.

just been relaxing at the house, eating way too much. got a hair cut. yayyy.

started trying to learn the piano. today I actually started reading music, bad news is the music is way too advanced for me, i have no idea how to keep time, and i dont know the basic setup of where my hands are supposed to be before i start playing ect ect. also the keyboard im using has only 33-35 keys instead of the usual 88, lol. so i clearly have to step my piano game up.

played bball with alok yesterday, got lost trying to get to west hartford univ of CT. parking lot court, lol.

aakash is in the hospital, his ulcer is acting up. So far he has stabilized, but he doesnt seem to be getting much better. I'm sure he will be fine though, hang in there big guy. I actually visited him today, he was chilling watching full house and sponge bob lol.

okay, i got a gym membership today so i am about to go run. I know i could run outside, but its hot and the road is uneven and bumpy lol. ppeaceeee

What Up World, Its The End of GWU For Me!

Hey World. Well, I am about to graduate in 3 days. Maybe it is at times like this, moments of immense transition, that one is supposed to ruminate on how he has lived his life. In any case, it's probably the time that most of us do so anyways.

So, I am graduating with a double major in economics and statistics without a job prospect in sight. The half way good news though is that I decided to continue schooling myself in the ways of the world, this time shifting to the ways of law. Worst come to worst, I could have probably found a job, but it probably wouldn't have been the greatest one (read: pay well) and my law school decision could possibly end up being a better move in the long run. But, as my favorite quotation says: "In the long run, we are all dead."

LOL.

Anywho, This last 4 years has definitely been an enlightening experience filled with personal discovery and I hope...growth. It amazes me that in the past, whenever I have thought I have had it all figured out, a few years later I have a completely different philosophical standpoint. The lesson I've learned is that I should never assume I "get it," and for the last 2 years that has basically been my modus operandi. Another lesson: almost all of the things my parents warned me about or told me to do that I disagreed with turned out to be true. Or maybe I'm looking at the past subjectively. I still remember a phone call with my mom last semester where she basically ended the conversation by telling me not to leave my room after dark for the sake of my own safety, ROFFLE.


So, what have I learned about life? IDK. I know that there is so much out there that I have yet to experience, that I will probably never experience. I know I would like to, but at the same time I understand that life, as we know it, is essentially meaningless, in that the only point of life may be existence itself.

Anyways, I have also learned the value of personal investment. Invest in yourself through hard work and dedication, build your self up and you will be an asset to the world. Because of this, I want to be a hard worker, I want to be on my grind. I have a plan, I've always had plans. My only question is, when do the plans end. Will it always just be constant hard work. Maybe it will be, maybe i'll have the weekends to play. In any case, I think I can deal with it. Without any work to do, what would I have to do anyways?

Wow, this is getting pretty rambley.

Another lesson I've learned with is that your much better off laughing something off than making a big deal about it. Anger is so temporary, sometimes when it wears off you feel like you're waking up from a strange dream. But, on the other hand, actions are the basis for character, and you can't excuse every little indiscretion.

In the end, its all about the people you know. The relationships you have with the world outside your mind. I think the most important lesson I can think of right now that I should remember for the rest of life is that I could live a life of solitude if i wanted. But, for whatever physiological reason, it would make me a miserable person. I think that your connection to the outside world is probably the single most important aspect of my life, and I want it to grow.

In any case, another lesson i've learned is that its tough to fight your emotions. You can try and reason with them, but they are so visceral and primal, its tough to put them to bed, even if your higher consciousness wants to. Doesn't mean you shouldn't stop trying though. Except, I guess happiness is the one emotion that I want, even if it turns out to be irrational.

Sum Up:

goodbye GWU, I've had some great times, I've had some bad times, but hey: it coulda been a lot worse.

AND

hello NYU.

Lupe Fiasco - is he a solo artist?

What up yo. Lupe Fiasco is a solo artist, but Matthew Santos is on half the hooks, damn that Santos has a great voice. Apparently he can't write though. I wonder if his solo material is any good, I do know that Lupe writes all the hooks that Santos sings on Lupes albums.

anyway, I can't wait to hear this song in full:



too bad he is saying "I thought I was down" instead of "I thought I was god"
"I thought I was god" would be a much more interesting chorus line than the bland and generic "I thought I was down"

if Lupe didn't delete his twitter account I would tell him that myself.

Oh well, guess its up to me to write the I thought I was god song. Too bad I have never thought that, I will try and channel chris p. OH SNAP!

I'm Such a Great "Mathlete!"

On Monday I trudged my way through the thick rain with no umbrella (forgot it on Amtrak) from E street all the way to the to the crumbling, stale green basement of the GWU Stat department on Penn Ave.

Usually me and this other stat tutor chit chat while we switch over shifts. I noticed she was on a website custom designing a t-shirt. It was a bright green shirt with "Mathlete" emblazoned on the front. My first reaction was, "oh snap!" she must have been a mathlete too, or at least appreciates them, I must fill her in on my mathletic past!

So I asked her about the t-shirt and it actually had quite the backstory. Her roommate works for the Special Olympics headquarters in DC and is always telling her about how the staff there uses the word "athlete" interchangeably with the word "retard." For example: "That Jimmy, he is such a great athlete!" I know, how messed up is that? And these are the same people who got on Obama for the bowling comment, LOL.

Anyways, apparently her and her boyfriend have always joked about this unseemly reversal and even took it one step further. They decided that, along the same line of thinking: retard is to athlete as social retard is to mathlete. Thus, as a special inside joke she was making mathlete t-shirts as a birthday present for her boyfriend.

At this point I thanked my luck that I hadn't excitedly brought up my past exploits on the math team before she explained the story behind her t-shirt. Oh well, one day us mathletes will rise up and gain the respect we deserve.

elementary school redux pt.1

I have realized that during my elementary school time white people probably differentiated themselves by the European country of their ancestors. The parents of Irish children probably told them of their proud Irish heritage and maybe some of them told them of some bad deeds the English may have done in the past. Italian families probably watched The Godfather and lamented the fall of Mussolini (JK.....he never fell, ask his grand daughter). Jewish parents probably taught their kids the dradel song. I wonder if any animosity or discomfort was brought upon by differences in "race" between children.

I had no such problems when I was in elementary school. They were all just white to me. It was only later that I learned of these things. Pat denies he's any part German, Dan hates the English, and I don't fancy any race or creed. down with the planet!

Al Franken vs. Norm Coleman....312 votes?

According to today's edition of the New York Times, Al Franken is poised to win the 2nd senator seat in Minnesota by a wide margin of 312 votes. Of course, the Republican incumbent and seeming loser Norm Coleman has appealed the verdict so things are not completely settled, but it seems like eventually Franken will be named Senator.

You know what sucks about this situation? A lot. 312 votes is a incredibly slim margin in comparison to the 3 million votes cast. That means that 49.989% of voters did not want Franken as their senator. He definitely won't have any "political capital" and a lot of voters will be left with a sour taste in their mouth.

This is democracy at its dirtiest. It is not an ideal situation for a Senator going into his first term, but it is something Franken will have to live with. Honestly, I am guessing their is not much difference between Republicans and Democrats in Minnesota anyways. It's probably just a bunch of split hairs. Of course, some split hairs are over whether to fund a statue and others are over whether to fund an abortion clinic...

the manner in which i received my first driving infraction.

what is up, cake cups.

i want to relate a story to you all.

hmmmmmmmm. what shall it be.

I got my first ticket in the year of two naught naught eight. After being stopped by three cops since getting my license and smooth talking my way out of a ticket each time (ask about me son) I was finally done in by a video camera?

It was at a beach in Rhode Island. My sister was on a visit during a med school break and her, me, and my cousins all decided to go on a little road trip and have some fun in the sun.

Parking was a hassle at this particular beach and we had a lot of stuff to bring with us. We decided that my sister and my cousin Swetha would unload near the entrance to the actual beach and go find a spot while the rest of us went to park. There were signs that said no loading/unloading but we did a really quick scramble and got them out without beach security yelling at us.

In any case, a month or so later my dad calls me up and tells me he had just received a ticket in the mail for 62 dollars. Dag, a video camera perched on a telephone pole (im guessing) had done me in.

that is really all there is to say. you can't smooth talk an automated system.

at least, not yet. i'm getting there...

Update on my life, last spring break of undergrad.

I've decided there is no use for this blog being anything else than a journal of my life for me to reflect upon in the years to come. I mean, maybe once in awhile I've have some interesting point to make about the greater world, but not on anything close to a regular basis. Maybe tonight though, I really don't feel like working on my econ thesis. I hate my thesis.

This spring break was pretty bland. Playing basketball with mike p was a lot of fun, I had not played basketball in a long time. Plus I had been sick for like over a week and finally getting some movement into my life felt good. Also, it was a great day weather wise.

I wish I had been better prepared for my interview with the SEO on Wed the 18th. However, I was not for a variety of reasons that are mostly my fault. I filled out all my taxes instead of working on the SEO stuff which was dumb. It turns out that SEO was really hard, I didn't learn that until the day before the interview when I read on a message board that they conduct "stress" interviews. I didn't prepare my anwsers well enough before hand.

THe actual interview was hilarious. There were two women interviewing me, with one asking the majority of the questions. The majority quesiton asker would ask me questions then stare at her computer and type really loudly while I gave my anwser. I knew going into it that the interviewers would do stuff like that. However, I had not prepared my anwsers well enough and when I talk off the top of my head I really start to talk very fast because thoughts just pile up on each other and I think that really makes me sound pretty anxious, even if I'm not, although...I was very anxious haha.

Anywas, I'm sure ill do better next time. It was cool going on the NY subway all by myself. wow, that makes me sound lame because im 21 years old....

It was also cool when on the way back home the 4 train uptown had broken down and the subway operators had given a garbled message about how to go to some other train to get uptown but I could not understand it. So I basically walked in some direction that I thought may be correct, hoping to find another subway station more uptown that had a running 4 train. I was walking through NYC all by myself with really no idea where I was going...and happily it worked out well. Wow, i am lame.

NYC is dirtier than DC, but not really that bad. At least the area I was in. The streets were a little narrower, and the bulidings ALOT higher. This caused there to be some immense shadows making the whole place seem a little darker (NYC is definately more Gothom than DC, which is more metropolis in the sense that it is lit better...).

Today I helped my dad attach the dryer vent to the new dryer. that was good times, i felt like I had accomplished something with my hands...

I really have to get going on this thesis, i'll do it 2marrow....

Also, yesterday was the day of decadence for sure. well yesterday, and the night before yesterda when aakash slept over. It's over for me now though, it's time to become a healthy, normally functioning human being again. LETS DO THIS!

LifemcLifes

Hey what up. I got an exam tomorrow. It will be splendid.

you know, this may be the exact wrong time to be writing in this blog.

Is there a time when the human brain is just incapable of original (or any serious) thought at all?
If so, this may be one of those times. I just feel like closing my eyes and thinking only easy thoughts, ones that just float at the top of my head. Ones that whisk to and fro randomly, coming and going but really having no consequence.

That is how I was feeling, but when I started thinking about this my mind has become more active. Although, there is a pulsing pain in the lower left side of the back of my skull which makes me think that all this thought is causing my brain some strain. This could all be the result of how cruddy I feel right now, although I feel like I have been slowly getting better, which is nice.

hey hey my my, rock and roll will never die. (COORY BOUKER AND THEE cOrruPTION FOs MAN)

I am bored right now so I thought I would write in this blog.

write about what exactly? Well let us see. Recently I sawr a film called "Street Fight" which documented the 2002 mayoral race between incumbent Sharpe James and young newcomer and outsider Cory Booker.

Do some research on Cory Booker and you can definitely see he is a "choir boy" type candidate. Cory doesn't smoke or drink. He went to Stanford, then became a Rhodes Scholar, and topped it all off by getting his Juris Doctor from Yale. On top of all that, when he moved to Newark and got elected as a city councilmen he chose to live in one of the public housing projects he represented. He made 100 grand a year and still chose to live in a public housing project!

Examining all I have just mentioned, Cory obviously seems like quite the reputable, respectable individual. His opponent, incumbent Sharpe James seems like just the opposite. A lot of his staff members were indicted on corruption charges in the 1990s and he himself was an old school machine politician who spared no expense in dishing out dirty tricks against Booker in the 2002 campaign.

Now, I have grown so cynical of politicians, and even righteous moral leaders in general, that the case of Cory Booker perplexes me. I mean, even Martin Luther King jr. had dalliances with girls while married in hotel rooms when he was travelling around giving speechs. No one is perfect, are they? Does not everyone get corrupted?

You know how people get corrupted. Their desire to be "the man." To get everything that causes them pleasure, even if its at the expense of others own well being. People want to command the respect of the world, to have the good life: fine things, fats, salts, sweets, and of course: a lot of sex. This desire for pleasure is pretty strong, combine it with the seed of doubt that just maybe, just maybe, this is all there is, and we only have one life to live.

In addition, we may become corruput ecause we are just so self centered. We can't feel the hardships or pleasure of other people, not in the visceral, chemical sense we feel our own emotions. That lack of empathy could in fact breed the capacity for corruption within us. I know it already has for me, it definitely has. What I dont know, is if it has for Cory Booker.

Who is this Cory Booker? Does he actually care about helping other people? Maybe he does, Maybe he really does. Although, maybe he doesn't. I'll keep an eye on his career for the rest of my life, because I am really interested in his own morality.

If it turns out he truly has the self control and discipline to "Do The Right Thing," well then...I'll hate myself for not having the same strength.

untitled. pt.1

my blood is not clotting
its not clotting!!!

come save me bernard.


loooool.


thats an excerpt from an extra hilarious bathroom opera i wrote in my head yesterday. too bad it will never get produced.

The National Ad Council and me not dying a fiery death

I was watching an episode of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip instead of working on my Econ thesis, and I couldn't help but remember how I almost died (or received serious injury) on Interstate 91 this past summer.

I was coming back from watching The Dark Knight (for the third time! but that is another story lol) at the Enfield Mall Cinemas. Rolling with me was Steve, Jerry, Marlyn, and Justin. We were all riding in Justin's (his dads lol) ill fire red Mustang convertible. It was a pretty small car and I was packed into the back with Marlyn and Jerry. I can't exactly remember but I think we were all squeezed so tight that we didn't really bother with seatbelts. All I know is that on the way back home we were driving pretty fast and passing a lot of cars. Halfway home we ended up on the left (passing) lane, stuck behind a dark green van that must have been going 45 MPH. Well Justin started tailgating the van pretty badly and Jerry started vocally telling Justin to chill out. Next thing you know the green van switches lanes so Justin starts to speed up. Except, it turns out there was a car directly ahead of the green van which was blocked from our view. Justin had to veer into the shoulder lane to avoid hitting it. After that Jerry and Justin got into an argument over the lack of safe driving going on in the Mustang lol. I remember Marlyn whispering to me that she thought she thought we were all about to die.

Through all this time Steve and I had stayed relatively cool. We all just laughed off Justin's close call with car calamity. I remember thinking what is the big deal, there is a big difference between going to the edge of crashing a car to actually crossing that edge. Plus, Justin is a far better driver than I will ever be so who am I to attack his tactics. However, and now this goes back to the beginning of the story, while I was procrastinating and watching Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip on Hulu, every commercial break turned out to be a 30 second ad from the National Ad Council. This particular set of ads featured reckless car drivers up front and one person in the back who is silently worried, but not saying anything. Then all of the sudden a slick TV spokesperson pops up and tells everyone (in the style of winning a prize on the price is right) how great a deal they are getting by winning the all new, all great "Slow Down" which will prevent them from dying. The ad ends with the message that there is no TV announcer to save you and that you have to say something to stave off death from reckless drivers.

Reflecting on these ads I started to think about that incident last summer and how I probably should have acted differently. I should have said something which did not incite anger but instead was a constructive criticism of Justin's driving at that one moment. Tailgating is never a good idea.

Now reflecting on me changing my mind, I've realized that the National Ad Council's public service advertisements have actually affected my own thoughts and ideas. This scares me, I don't really know why, but it does. I consider myself a savy consumer of advertisments, and most of the time I discard the messages (I percieve are) in advertisements. But not this one. Being polite is good, but it's a bad idea to die out of politness, lol. "Nandhish, well he was a good one, he was polite till the end. Politeness ended him." LOOOOL I am dumb. peace

2009 NBA Dunk Contest

when: Saturday Feb 14th. 2009, 8-11 pm

Who:

Dwight Howard (2008 Champion, 2007 3rd place) - Orlando Magic
Nate Robinson (2006 Champion, 2008 Runner Up) - New York Knicks
J.R. Smith (2005 3rd place) - Denver Nuggets
Rudy Fernandez (Fan Vote Winner) - Portland Trailblazers
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Okay, for lame-0s like me who are doing nothing on Valentines day, we can look forward to the NBA dunk contest, I probably am more than most normal people. This years dunk contest has the potential to be pretty great, but it most probably wont be.

I can lay the blame square on two things: the infusion of props and gimmicks in the dunk contest in the last few years, and Rudy Fernandez.

Rudy Fernandez still makes me angry. Judging from YouTube videos he is extremely nonathletic, he barely gets his head to the net when he goes up for a dunk. He is only in the dunk contest because he won the fan vote. Of the three NBA players who were contestants in the fan vote contest, he was the least deserving candidate. Joe Alexander was clearly the best dunker out of the 3, he even hit his head on the rim in a video to try and drum up support. However, because europeans and other global NBA fans blindly went with the foriegn guy, we are stuck with sucky Fernadez.

Howard, even though he has the potential to be a great dunker, even though he sometimes relies on the gimmick. His last two dunk contests have been half gimmick, half awesome. Overall, he is a very good contestant.

JR Smith is a straight up balling contestant. The two televised dunk contests he has previousley participate in showed him as a creative, ungimmicky, high jumping dunk powerhouse. He was the first ever to do a behind the back dunk in an NBA dunk contest (2005) and he even tried to do a 360 behind the back in the 2004 Mcdonalds dunk contest. However, this guy is like 6'6" and he isnt the super highest jumping guy ever so I really don't know if he has what it takes to d something truly insane in the dunk contest, we will see.

Nate Robinson is incredibly short, but he doesnt really rely on gimmicks either. In the two dunk contest he has been in, he has really brought it. He tried to do dunk I never thought a short person would ever do. He missed an amazing off the back board 2 foot take off east bay in the 2006 contest. In addition, there is a YouTube video floating around of him doing a 2 foot take off east bay 180 from out out of bounds (although there is disagreement on whether the rim is 10 feet).

CONCLUSION:

Fernandez is almost certainly a write-off contestant in this years contest.

We can only hope that Robinson and Smith don't feel pressured by Howard's past success to do very gimmicky, overly showey dunks.

Here is hoping that this contest is awesome.

Rick Ross sucks

He sucks.

Alternative Spring Breaks are Lame!

Over the last few weeks, whenever I have approached the Foggy Bottom Metro here in DC, I've beden confronted with the chants, yells, and exclamations of overzealous, chirpy alternative spring breakers hitting up decent, hard working folk for money. "Alternative," meaning they are not going to be sucking jello shots off each others navels in Cancun. Instead, they'll be piously building homes for the less fortunate, cleaning up dirty parks, administering first aid, or teaching dirty little kids how to read...you get the picture. Because they have so generously decided to throw away their spring breaks and devote themselves to doing volunteer work they believe we should support their trip, because....damned if they'll spend any money on it.

Alternative spring breaks are a load of croc, they have no economic logic. If your goal is to make the world the best place it could possibly be, in the most efficient manner, you would never go on an alternative spring break. Just spending money on air fare to travel across the nation or to another country negates any benefit of your trip. Instead, you could do civic work locally, where there is no shortage of its need. In an case, it's alright to have a vacation guys and gals. People owe it to themselves to relax, unwind, and reflect. Further, I suspect, most alternative spring breaks aren't spent doing sanctimous civic construction 100% of the time. These trips are group activites, and friends probably spend their nights drinking or sight seeing. It's pretty lame to try and make yourself feel fulfilled by spending a quarter of your vacation inefficiently building a house at public sector pace, but it's even lamer to have used other people's money to do so.

Look, there are people who need help, and we should help them. But, even if this was 2005, going hundreds of miles to help rebuild homes after Hurricane Katrina for just a week is not worth it. If you want to be efficient, you have to totally dedicate yourself to that cause. You're not a carpenter or a construction worker. Building houses is not easy, it takes skilled labor. Going to New Orleans for a few days and doing some grunt work which someone else much closer to the area could do, maybe for a little money, makes no sense. You could instead become a part of, in whichever way is the most efficient, the overarching effort to rebuild New Orleans. Something like this would require taking a semester off from school, but invaluable experience would be gained, and it would be even better (and more efficient) if it somehow related to your educational and career goals.

Long story short, enjoy your one week reprieve from reading, quizzes, tests, and social drama. Don't feel like you're helping the world by putting up some vinyl siding, you're not. Be efficient, enjoy life, recharge.

Fear Of A Gay Man...

So many young men (and older men, but I won't focus on them) claim to be "disgusted" or "repulsed" by the thought of homosexual acts between two males. These men are from a variety of geographic and socioeconomic backgrounds.

Personally, I think its not all bullshit, but that men should get over themselves. I can understand the male uneasiness towards homosexuality, but not its total extent and severity. When I was a child the thought of kissing another man made me squirm. Why? I'm still not sure. Maybe it was because I had never seen such an act before or that homosexuality was not at all talked about by my immediate or extended family. One reason for sure, had to be my heterosexuality. I was not wired to be attracted to the male gender. But before long, as I became a teen, the idea of homosexual sex stopped bothering me at all. I accepted it as readily as I accepted the idea of heterosexual sex. I reasoned that the two acts were really not so different mechanically, even if they were different in application.

This is where me and many males seem to differ. While my uneasiness with homosexuality was purely based on my own heterosexuality, there seems to be an additional conditioning element with many young men. They have never let go of that uneasiness with homosexuality and they have added on top of that the idea that homosexual behavior is "unnatural," "perverse," and "disgusting."

Why? Are these men prudes? Surely not. Although most of the men I know are pretty sexually inexperienced, presented with all sorts of kinky suggestions from any attractive women I'm sure they would jump at the chance (at least in private).

What does that mean? I'm not completely sure. Many who I have talked to, when asked to actually expand upon their repulsion of homosexuality, are unable to do so in any thoughtful or articulate manner. Their usual and banal response (if i may articulate it for them) is only to reiterate that the thought of two men having sex makes them physically and mentally shudder and that gay sex is not natural because only a man and a women can have a child.

I believe that, in truth, their communities are the author of their own beliefs. They believe what they are supposed to believe. They live (or grew up) in closed off societies, where gay people are not openly out in public. They belong to a boys club where "manliness" is put on a pedestal and any signs of homosexuality (synonymous with weakness) is totally frowned upon.

How did these communities form these beliefs? The source was probably fear. A heterosexual man's fear of a gay man coming onto him or his offspring. Fear of the stories they had heard of the stereotypically flamboyant gay man. Fear of anything different than the current order. Fear of the gay man borne out of a mix of ignorance and conservatism. Because gay people are traditionally so few in number relative to straight people, it is easy to see how straight men (who like the way things are) would single them out as a potentially subversive element to the local order.

However, those who fear the gay man. You must change your ways, you cannot keep your beliefs! Just as many racists from the 1950s and 1960s were not able to hold onto their own racism or pass it on to their children, you and your seed will be forced to change because that is the power of the tide! As gay people unify to increase their strength and rallying power, they cannot be ignored for much longer.


Don't fear gay people! Sure they make life more complicated, less uniform. But, they are just like us in the most important of ways. They too can be some of the most intelligent of human beings. And they too can be some of the most petty, ignorant, and callous. They too can love and care and grow and raise. They may be sexually different, but tis "no worse, than what's goin on in your parents' bedrooms." We must accept them just as they in turn, accept us.

Basically, accept. Don't be a bitch. Man up, you heterosexual sissies.

Saigon: Album Was It's Own Prophecy?

Saigon the rapper is most famous for acting as a fictionalized version of himself in the television show Entourage. But in the rap world he has probably had the most REAL buzz of any rapper in the last 3 years (although that buzz has died down considerably now).

Anyways, Saigon has released a new song called "trans-atlantic slave deal." The song details the trials and tribulations of attempting to release his album "The Greatest Story Never Told" on Atlantic Records before he was dropped from the label in May 2008. The song is in the format of a radio interview with the verses consisting of Saigon's answers to the questions posed. This is especially hilarious to me because I once heard a Hot 93.7 interview with Saigon (probably one of a hundred he has done) that was very similar to the format of this song (except without the answers being rapped).

No one can deny that Saigon has talent as a rapper, he is probably better than most who release records these days. However, his claims in this song seem pretty dubious. All of his forays into making "conscious music" like he claims his album is all about have been overly simple and pretty disastrous (see "Pain in My Life" and "Believe It"). Joe Budden just released a random diss track aimed at Saigon called "Letter to Saigon" where he brings up a lot of good points. Sidebar: Jay-Z on "Come On Baby" (Saigon's feature track) did a pretty classic verse. Saigon was not bad either...but Jay-Z made that song...actually they complemented each other pretty well but that song with just Saigon on it is not nearly on the same level. Also, Just Blaze (the producer) KILLED THAT TRACK.

http://www.imeem.com/people/8pppM_/music/uHOcBRWc/saigon_come_on_baby_remix_feat_swizz_beatz_jayz/

It seems to me that Saigon has hit upon a great idea. Put out a couple good mixtape tracks and just hype up your album saying its the best thing ever and then never release it and call yourself a victim of the game. You go down in history as one of the greatest rappers who never got a chance and people will always give you some modicum of respect. Saigon may even have been thinking of this plan from the start with his super ironic title "The Greatest Story Never Told" which has (will?) not (never?) be told.

Of course, Joe Budden (as far as I know) has no reason to go and diss Saigon other than to try and create some buzz for his new album. Joe Budden is a good rapper, he even makes some good existential rap but he just can't get any traction with mainstream audiences. Sucks for him. Really.

Both Saigon and Joe Budden ain't no Lupe Fiasco, so oh well for them.

Trans-Atlantic Slave Deal: http://www.xxlmag.com/online/?p=34250

Letter To Saigon: http://www.xxlmag.com/online/?p=34449